The following are the different categories of lecturers you will meet in our various higher Institutions:
1.The Sadist – Most students are scared of
him. He comes to class, threatens
everyone, you rarely see him smile, always
serious with a straight face. He never gives
an ‘A’ and when result comes out, his
courses are always mass failure. He is
usually the most hated lecturer.
2.The comedian – He is more or less a
stand-up comedian. Always lively, students
look forward to his laugher-filled lectures
but once taken for granted, he can be
shocking. He is usually stingy with marks/
3.The Student lecturers – Also known as
Assistant lecturers. They usually start as
errand boys to some top lecturers in the
department, they mark exam scripts,
invigilate during tests & exams and later
graduate to helping the lecturers with
some of their lectures. They are usually
hyperactive, aggressive and proud which
usually results into a clash with the
4.The Crazy Lecturer – He rarely smiles,
does things in an unusual manner
including ways of speaking(with big
grammar like Hon. Patrick Obahiagbon), a
funny dress sense(with long bling-bling
chains like Ayo Oritsejafor). He is always
REAL and serious, doesn’t care what his
students feels or think about him, highly
unpredictable and lectures for 3/4hrs until
the students complains.
5.The Fatherly Lecturer – He is always
matured, homely, approachable, and
friendly. He takes his time to extensively
teach his students in such a way that once
you fail his course, you know that you truly
deserve to fail. He is students’ favourite.
6.The Lazy Lecturer – He comes to class
twice in a semester(One, for course
introduction & later, for revision, a week to
Exams). He doesn’t lecture nor teach, he
only comes to read out loud while the
students listen. He doesn’t care if you
understand or not, and 15 or 20mins, he
is done for the day’s lecture.
7.The ‘Runs’ lecturer – He comes to class,
gives shabby lectures and drop his mobile
digits or his errand boy’s digits(The coded
students knows what to do).5k 8k 10k for ‘A’ depending on
the importance or Unit of the course.
8.The Departmental dog – Woman
wrapper. He takes advantage of any
vulnerable female student, it doesn’t
matter how young she is, the se# addict
just want to get laid at the slightest
opportunity. Hide your babe, sister,
daughter from him.
9.The story teller – 90% of his lecture is the
story about his days in the University and
how serious/dedicated they were those
days + how he still consult his 1973
lecture notebook. He talks about how bad
the Gov’t and the school management is,
especially if he is an ardent ASUU member.
He usually receive at least 10 phone calls
within a lecture.
10a.The Religion fanatic (Daddy G.O) – This
type of lecturer comes to class to chip in
the Gospel within his lecture, inviting the
entire class to his church & mid week
programmes. He is always gentle & Godly.
10b.The Religion fanatic (Mallam) – He
comes to class and usually separates the
female students from the male students
before his lecture begins. He looks gentle
and you don’t need to be told before you
know he is a muslim. Take him for granted
and you will pay dearly for it.
11 Unserious lecturers: comes for lecture twice a semester and picks offense easily that will make him divert his topic to etiquette (decent way to behave especially in public) always send for the course rep to give assignment that he will not mark but comes to complain that no body got up to 4. just pay him and you will pass.